Roundtable Revealed: The Creation Of NOTR

Before the greatness of this story is lost forever, the dedicated readers of this finest of fake news sources will, for the first time, be able to read about the glorious and surprisingly humble beginnings of the News of the Round Table.
In order to ensure that the readers of NOTR get a complete storytelling, this author will do something that has traditionally been avoided to preserve the integrity of the stories run by NOTR:
I'm going to speak in the first person. Hopefully, this will be the last time I ever have to do this, violating one of the fundamental rules of my code of journalistic ethics. Which I shall post at another time.
The News of the Roundtable's existence is owed to many people/fiends, but mostly to one. That man is not the Pickup Artist. That man is Dmitri Martin. But I'll explain that later.
First I will recount the forming of the Fiends of the Roundtable. In a certain high school in the sad wasteland of New Jersey, the fiends were born. It started with the Fiendly Four: The Crazy Israeli Founder, The Unibrowed Fiend, the Multiple-Personalitied Fiend, and the Important Fiend. Sadly, as of this posting, none of the writers for this blog were among the Fiendly Four. I was, at best, an honorary fiend in the beginning. That original band of four was termed the "Fiends of the Roundtable" by the Founder on a fateful morning in the early days of Senior year. During the early days of fiendom, many of our conversations revolved around many of the topics you read of in our blog today: vh1, the pickup artist, pterodactyls, Arash, and Reputation Juice(weed).
Now, we of the Roundtable frequently had lunch together. For what seemed no particular reason, during the week we ate at rectangular tables. On Friday.......... Roundtables. One fateful friday, I ate at a rectangular table. The Unibrowed Fiend pointed out that it was wrong, and it was "Roundtable Friday". And so it begun.
Over the next few months, membership of the fiends grew, and with it, the fiendliness of our school. Gans Meltdown Tuesday was begun after somebody of the Gans persuasion had a meltdown at breakfast. As we of the fiends started visiting colleges, we were bestowed with college visitation names as prefixes to our birth names. These titles included: Horny, Reputation, Crazy Israeli, Yammy, Teppy-Tepp, Multiple-Personality, and Word-Association. It was during this time that the short-lived television show "Important Things With Dmitri Martin" came out. It was also during this time when both the Founding Fiend and the Unibrowed Fiend noticed the rising fiendosity levels of the school, and were disturbed by it. In fact, after initial enthusiasm, the Founding Fiend and the Unibrowed Fiend withdrew their support. The Unibrowed Fiend contributed one total article to NOTR. The Multiple-Personalitied Fiend contributed two. Eventually, NOTR also lost the support of the Important Fiend. But I will get to that later.
So one fateful night, I was watching "Important Things With Dmitri Martin". In this episode, he introduced the concept of "Fake Newspaper Friday", primarily to disturb old people in nursing homes(He also invented "Double Important Wednesdays". Dmitri Martin is an honorary fiend, though he doesn't even know it). Noticing the alliteration, I immediately texted the Important Fiend(who bears strong physical resemblance to Dmitri Martin). His response indicated that, partially due to frustrations with our school's crappy paper and our loads of free time, we should create a fake newspaper of our own. And thus, "The News Of The Roundtable" was born. Sadly, after an editorial career spanning three( well, two the third doesn't really count) issues, the Important Fiend withdrew from NOTR.
And there you have it. The beginning. Now I haven't told you everything(for example, the influence of a creature whose call is "whhhhhhoooooaaaaaaaaaaaa....." or the role of Shalom Bombay), but the gist of it. Now you understand. or are more confused. I don't really care.